Vandals Seldom Correct Grammar

When you see the sign at the left, it's kind of a let down to open the door to find a single toilet, instead of the multiple promised.

Sure, you generally only need one toilet in a given situation, but still.

Serves You Right, Twit

Booby traps are so named for the idea that a foolish person, or boob, will set them off. Since these traps are by nature difficult to spot and easy to set off, it hardly seems fair to question the victim's intelligence.

If booby traps let off some kind of audible alarm when you got close (WARNING! WARNING! DEADFALL AHEAD!) or were set where no one would find them (at the bottom of a well), THEN you'd be a boob for setting it off.

Somewhat related: a literal booby trap would be a devestating blow to breast-loving armies of the world.

Polish Up That Spelling

"Exspert Shoe Shine Here" - Sign at a shoe shine booth on 47th and 6th

No one shines a shoe better than a former Spert.

You Can Only Imagine Two

A new commercial for a Red Lobster promotion promises "lobster in more ways than you can imagine." They then go on to show a whopping three dishes.

Freezing Ice Holes

Always fill the ice tray. Always.

The number of situations where you'd prefer an empty tray to one full of refreshing ice is few to none.

The No Guest Dinner Party

No matter how you spin it (you're in the mood for it/it's easy/you're lazy), buying one box of mac and cheese, and nothing more, kind of makes you look like a loser.

Including Roofing Of A Hot Tin Nature

Furniture for cats is silly and somewhat redundant; everything they sit on becomes cat furniture. And they'll sit on more things than most.

Talk To Him Anyway

If you think you see singing sensation Seal at a bus stop and are thinking about asking for his autograph, stop and consider: would Seal ride the bus? Probably not, but the black guy with the scar you're looking at probably has interesting stories to tell, as well.